Hi! I am Annette again, and today Thursday, is the 5th day since I decided to enroll in this project, documenting every day that pass without calling or creating situations to approach Dark Cat.
Yesterday after I have passed all my work day without fail, he sent me a lost call...the blue light of my cell phone turned on...and I, more faster than fast and furious, call him back, twice! but he didn't answer! Then I sent him a text message asking why he called me, if he is not going to answer? Then he answer back saying that "he was in a meeting" and that He knows now that I wasn't die!! WTF!!! Definitely this guy is EVIL!
The fact that I called back, is not worrying me now, because this event, open up my eyes about two things:
- One: He is a jerk! He is doing jokes about me, my pain is laughing matter for him, so he doesn't care a shit about my feelings or how I am doing to get over and out from all this shit!! How can I put up with this?
- Second: All the discomfort I felt when he called me, NOOO!! It is unacceptable! I was cool, in peace, after his call I got sick and disturbed! Headache, anxiety, stomach ache, dry mouth....Com'on!! He doesn't deserve it! I don't like at all, feel like if I was a stupid girl! No more!
Then, thanks to the bitter sensation it caused on me, I got out pretty fast from the anxiety vortex that I usually fall. My recovery was more than fast, efficient and worthy of a prize, considering how my reactions were in previous similar situations were.
It gives me a different type of Hope. Not the hope that push me to look for him, is the hope that I can win this battle, the certainty that some day I will be exactly like him. I will have the power to ignore him, he wont move my ground, and I wont feel hate, there wont be hard feelings. I am going to be in peace with myself, and I will be able to breath clearly and continue walking as if nothing happened, toward to the future, and the past won't hurt me anymore...
AMEN!
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